Grand Plans: February 29, 2024
A semi-monthly newsletter from Grand Plans designed to normalize and celebrate our glorious geri-destiny through information, stories, real talk conversation, smart planning and shared experience.
Things I’m prattling on about today
It occurred to me during the midday Ash Wednesday service at All Saints Episcopal Church that I, Susanna Barton, may have been put on this earth with the express purpose of being a small market mortality influencer.
It’s all making sense now. Between the untimely passing of my mother (a most ungracious admission exam for mortality marketing 101), my annual Lenten postings about loss and death, and the whacked-out geriatric care situation that inspired a profusion of ruminations on death preparation and accepting and planning for our mortality, I have unexpectedly become a book-writing, workshop-leading, podcast-making aficionado on this taboo topic. What a totally unplanned misadventure it’s been! But the plot line is now clearly in focus, leaving me filled with thoughts about whether this is a calling revealed or a strange obsession reaching its crescendo. I’m pretty sure it’s the former.
These are the thoughts I had with myself in the pews. It made me wonder if the season of Lent and the process of preparing for our second half aren’t actually one and the same.
During Lent, we hear about lessening and giving up and preparing our hearts to serve. Yes, we are asked to consider giving up the things we love — the chocolate, the wine, the zesty potty mouth — but maybe that practice is more about humbling ourselves and not showing “piety before others in order to be seen by them,” as the Matthew 6:1-6 gospel explains, than it is about not indulging in the things we love. Maybe Lent is about taking a backseat so good ‘ole Jesus can take the wheel. In that same passage (16-21), Jesus also says some pretty Grand Plans-y stuff: “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust consume and where thieves break in and steal; but store up for yourselves treasure in heaven, where neither moth nor rust consumes and where thieves do not break in and steal.” It’s pretty clear to me he’s talking about getting rid of your stuff collection, even the Hummel figurines and big heavy dark brown furniture that you just. Can’t. Unload.
The psalm Ash Wednesday recitation was Psalm 103.8-14: “For he himself knows whereof we are made; he remembers that we are but dust.” This is a Grand Plan essential! No one, not one person on this planet, can escape their mortality. Not even Taylor Swift! Or that weirdo tech millionaire Bryan Johnson who’s trying to age-reverse by eating $2 million worth of nuts and berries each year. Jocelyn Wildenstein, the queen of Botox herself, cannot muster enough fillers and surgeries to beat death! We are all going to die one day soon, and getting there will not be easy or cheap. But it can be a fun and fulfilling one if we accept and plan for it.
I was relieved to see how Lent, Death and Grand Planning seem to have a special and inexplicable triunity. It makes me feel like this strange and seemingly disjointed second half path I’ve been on is actually one that’s been meandering through my life for a very long time. That feels like purpose to me, and like the good folks at All Saints like to say at the Dismissal with a little arm pump, “Right on!”
News you can use
Mortality mania and an ashes-to-ashes mentality begins with some cheerful perspective on how every organ in our body ages and accepting that it’s happening to you, too.
And what it feels like when you die. Not exactly a chipper thought, but aren’t you curious? I am.
Recognition of expiration dates starts with accepting that face in the mirror, being proud of what it’s become and where it’s headed, and going with the flow of life.
Acknowledging that to dust we shall return means we can have a “why not” attitude toward trying new things!
And lastly, we can celebrate and prepare for the fact that we not die for a very long time and that we will likely join a large and growing sector of the population — there are hundreds and hundreds of them.
It also means we can make a habit of being grateful for all the good in our lives, because it’s healthy and will sustain us.
My first piece has appeared on the site, Sixty & Me, a media company that reaches more than 500,000 60+ folks around the world! Check it out, this computes!:
Here’s the February issue of First Coast Senior Living for your reading pleasure. You can also download a PDF here.
Mark your calendars. The last Grand Plans: The Workshop event is March 19 from 5 p.m. to 6:30 p.m. at the Literary Lounge in Jacksonville, FL. These gatherings have been so fun!
Grand Plans Podcast
Season 3 of the Grand Plans podcast is rocking and rolling. Each episode is a conversation about four of the 20 steps of a workable Grand Plan recorded from the Grand Plans: The Workshop events, plus a few more surprises. Find it wherever you download your podcasts! Here’s a link to Season 3 Episode 2:
Geris-prudence
Hiring an attorney to prepare your legal estate planning and end-of-life documents is money well spent. So is hiring an elder law attorney to guide you or your loved ones through complicated caregiving and senior living scenarios — these professionals are essential if you want to design a smart and legitimate game plan. I cannot underscore this enough. Without an attorney on your side, you are sure to get tripped up by the many nuances and details you had no idea existed. In elder planning, lawyers are worth every penny! Let my friend Seth K. Bell tell you why:
Advanced health and fitness
Here’s a word on strength and protein intake from ACE-certified personal trainer and Silver Sneakers fitness instructor Amy Gunther from her newly released, top-selling book, “Smarter Not Harder: The 7 Tenets of Mindful Fitness After 50.”
“Let’s take a quick moment to address food. Without delving too deeply into nutrition, I do think it’s worth noting that many seniors do not have adequate protein intake. The daily goal should be 0.6 g of protein per pound of body weight daily. For example, a 150-pound person would have a protein goal of 90 grams of protein per day. Foods high in protein are eggs, lean meats, beans, and dairy.”
And mark your calendars for March 6! Amy is presenting a wellness workshop at the Williams YMCA in Mandarin from 1 p.m. to 2:30 p.m. in Studio A. Email YMCA Healthy Living Director Melinda Lewis at mlewis@fcymca.org to register. Cost is $20 for members and $40 for non-members. This is also an opportunity to purchase Amy’s top-selling book, Smarter Not Harder! Don’t miss this!
The grand sum
This piece, “Helping Lower-Income Adults Afford Medicare: National and State by State Facts,” from the National Council on Aging includes some very helpful financial-medical information on Medicare benefits. “Benefits outreach and enrollment works—but without continued federal funding, low-income adults on Medicare will be left behind, unable to afford basic health care. Federal funding supports State Health Insurance Assistance Programs (SHIPs), area agencies on aging, and benefits enrollment centers that help older adults apply for Medicare Savings Programs and Extra Help. Get the facts on how many people are getting help in certain states, and how many more could be reached.”
Shelf life
Of course, my mortality mania leads me to this bestselling book. I’m just getting started with it, but it sounds very intriguing. “In The In-Between, Vlahos recounts the most impactful experiences she’s had with the people she’s worked with — from the woman who never once questioned her faith until she was close to death, to the older man seeing visions of his late daughter, to the young patient who laments that she spent too much of her short life worrying about what others thought of her — while also sharing her own fascinating journey.”
Shared experience
We can all learn from each other’s geri-scary moments. What are some of your takeaway lessons? What have you promised yourself you’ll never do to your loved ones? What worked for you? What didn’t? More conversation and story-sharing helps elevate the senior experience for all of us. If you want to share your grand tales, email susannabarton@me.com and I’ll put them in an upcoming newsletter.
O-bitchin’
James Curtis Rinaman, Jr., February 8, 1935 - January 26, 2024 “James Curtis Rinaman, Jr. passed peacefully from this life January 26, 2024, surrounded by his family. Jim was born February 8, 1935 in Miami (Lemon City), Florida, to Dr. James Curtis and Ruth Rader Rinaman. He was a devoted husband to his wife Gloria for more than 65 years, a beloved father and grandfather, a respected attorney, soldier and friend. While his legal, military and civic accomplishments were significant – Jim’s friends and loved ones knew him best as a family man.” Read the rest of this beautiful, well-written obituary of a great man here.
Some golden gedunk and goods
Get yourself another few copies of Grand Plans: How to Mitigate Geri-Drama in 20 Easy Steps and the Grand Planner for all the people who like getting gifts in your life! Visit www.mygrandplans.com for links to purchase on Amazon.
Check out our Grand Plans merch in our Etsy storefront.
